YOU'RE A MEDIUM!!!!!!!!!
It was in the most unlikely of places that all the pieces to the puzzle came together regarding all the things I'd felt, seen, heard all those years. This day I would learn many of the why's of what had I had worked to hide for most of my life. It was in a new friend's office in a very old building that the light finally turned on for me. Inwardly I was as calm as could be, however, I'll never forget that day I was both elated and mystified by the outcome of what was the turning point in my understanding and my life work.
Early one fall morning while I was still living in Knoxville's downtown historic district, I walked down to a very old and lovely brick Georgian style building where the small business administration offices were at the time. It was a lovely warm morning and a walk seemed more enjoyable than driving the half mile to the offices. Down the roads filled with all manner of antique homes I walked to my destination.
From the very time I had moved to the area I had been drawn to looking at that magnificent old building with it's brick exterior and white shutters like a moth to the flame. As I walked into it for the first time early that morning, a myriad of sensations happened. This was to be a very early morning meeting before most of the good folks working there came to the office. Immediately when I walked into the lower entrance and reception area I felt as if I were being greeted. As I walked into the elevator which was physically empty for all but myself in there I had a crowded feeling as if there were many people in there with me. When I reached the top floor, I walked through areas of cold and very warm energy dismissing this to the air systems in the building.
As I walked up the hall to my left for my meeting I looked behind me repeatedly because I felt as if someone was following me. The aroma of coffee was a lovely welcome to me as I found my way to the office. My meeting took place as planned with Jim and we discussed expanding and marketing my swimming pool business. I proceeded to fill out forms in the little alcove because no matter what you do it seems there is always a set of forms to fill out. I noticed the carpet was an interesting shade of grey blue as I finished and walked out.
After my meeting with Jim I had intended to drop by and see Bob a new friend whom I had met the week before at a business meet and greet type thing. My boyfriend at the time introduced us and we hit it off very well with synchronicities with regard to each of us having three daughters, food and a few things in common. I had known from what I sensed he could use a friend and ear so I went off down the hall to the main area to say hello.
Again I had the feelings of very cool areas as I walked down the hall into the main area. His door I found open but there was no one in the office, but there was a fresh cup of coffee on his desk. So I decided to get a cup of coffee as well and come back in a moment or two. Upon my return there was Bob, this big six foot five dark haired fellow that as I found out later had played college foot ball. He was all smiles and greeted me with his gracious southern manners.
We chatted about daughters, work, business and what we both had done in life thus far. Our conversation was lasting longer than I had originally intended. The energy in his office was different to say the least and I kept feeling as if there was something going on. He mentioned a few things and I went with my feelings to ask “Have you ever noticed anything strange about the energy in this building?” to which he replied a bit eagerly “What do you mean?”
There was something in his being that I knew I could trust him immediately with what I was about to say. He was acting like a giant little kid behind his business desk even with a suit and tie on. I began to tell him of the cold and warm spots and the feelings of being followed all through out the building. He said to me just then “Hold on a minute.” He proceeded to get up from his comfortable chair and walk over to the door, and closed it rather quickly. Sitting down again, noticing my watching him intently, he said “some folks around here won't like hearing what you have to say.” I understood what he meant and proceeded to explain my earlier experiences.
He asked me if I knew anything of the history of the building. I admitted to him that because I had been too busy in my life raising my girls and getting by, that history lessons on the area were greatly lacking. As he told me a bit of the building's history I interrupted him and said well that explains why that man is standing beside you then. He asked me point blank “What man?” Clearing my throat and feeling like I was treading on ice so very thin I was about to find myself over my head, I described this man to the best of my ability.
This strong character, with a grey uniform and gold epaulettes on the shoulders. He showed me a weary demeanor and was still standing strong. I detailed his face and hair white, with a goatee that somewhat made his face a bit pointed more than one would expect. Immediately, Bob became even more exited almost shouting “You can see the colonel! Oh my God you can see the Colonel!!!” This giant little kid emerged with so much excitement, which honestly wasn't anything I had experienced before when telling someone what I could see, shocked me. I was almost dumbstruck. Somebody was excited and happy I could do this. There wasn't time to process in my head his great joy in my revelation.
Bob started asking me many questions. “How long have I been able to do this?” “Do I do this often?” “What else can I pick up on?” and many more. The questions came so quickly I had to take a moment and a deep breath or two in order to reply. I told him that I'd always been able to do this and that it was something I didn't like to discuss because I'd grown up with such negatives about it that saying anything about my extended senses was honestly scary for me to say anything at all.
We talked about our upbringings and how he knew it was hard to come from this type of back ground and open mental doors we had been told not to in so many ways. We discussed the fear factor in some of our understand of how our religious upbringing had made us keep tabs on how we said things and to who we said them to.
Fear is a powerful base root emotion that can affect our entire energy system and being. With me, fear had been the major factor in keeping me quiet about my abilities and gifts until this point in my life. Very few whom I was close to knew I had any abilities. The extent of my abilities I had kept hidden better than the combination at Ft. Knox for most of my life... Even from me.
I met with Bob a few more times at the office when I had other meetings. Over the weeks he asked me if I he could reveal my little secret. At first I was exceptionally hesitant. This was something about me that until Bob had become my friend no one in my past liked. No one before had wanted to view this part of me positively. My abilities had always lead to so much difficulty in the past it took a lot for me to come forward enough for him to know, let alone those in the office he worked with daily.
This would be my next challenge opening the door a little further to the proverbial closet. How far would I walk through it would take years. Like with most things in our lives, it's often the little steps that make the big leaps.
