The Old Civil War Hospital and an Opening Gate
It was in the most unlikely of places
that all the pieces to the puzzle came together regarding all the
things I'd felt, seen, heard all those years. This day I would learn
many of the why's of what had I had worked to hide for most of my
life. It was in a new friend's office in a very old building that
the light finally turned on for me. Inwardly I was as calm as could
be, however,I'll never forget that day I was both elated and
mystified by the outcome of what was the turning point in my
understanding and my life work.
Early one fall morning while I was
still living in Knoxville's downtown historic district, I walked down
to a very old and lovely brick Georgian style building where the
small business administration offices were at the time. It was a
lovely warm morning and a walk seemed more enjoyable than driving the
half mile to the offices. Down the roads filled with all manner of
antique homes I walked to my destination.
From the very time I had moved to the
area I had been drawn to looking at that magnificent old building
with it's brick exterior and white shutters like a moth to the flame.
As I walked into it for the first time early that morning, a myriad
of sensations happened. This was to be a very early morning meeting
before most of the good folks working there came to the office.
Immediately when I walked into the lower entrance and reception area
I felt as if I were being greeted. As I walked into the elevator
which was physically empty for all but myself in there I had a
crowded feeling as if there were many people in there with me. When
I reached the top floor, I walked through areas of cold and very warm
energy dismissing this to the air systems in the building.
As I walked up the hall to my left for
my meeting I looked behind me repeatedly because I felt as if someone
was following me. The aroma of coffee was a lovely welcome to me as I
found my way to the office. My meeting took place as planned with
Jim and we discussed expanding and marketing my swimming pool
business. I proceeded to fill out forms in the little alcove because
no matter what you do it seems there is always a set of forms to fill
out. I noticed the carpet was an interesting shade of grey blue as I
finished and walked out.
After my meeting with Jim I had
intended to drop by and see Bob a new friend whom I had met the week
before at a business meet and greet type thing. My boyfriend at the
time introduced us and we hit it off very well with synchronicities
with regard to each of us having three daughters, food and a few
things in common. I had known from what I sensed he could use a
friend and ear so I went off down the hall to the main area to say
hello.
Again I had the feelings of very cool
areas as I walked down the hall into the main area. His door I found
open but there was no one in the office, but there was a fresh cup of
coffee on his desk. So I decided to get a cup of coffee as well and
come back in a moment or two. Upon my return there was Bob, this big
six foot five dark haired fellow that as I found out later had played
college foot ball. He was all smiles and greeted me with his
gracious southern manners.
We chatted about daughters, work,
business and what we both had done in life thus far. Our
conversation was lasting longer than I had originally intended. The
energy in his office was different to say the least and I kept
feeling as if there was something going on. He mentioned a few
things and I went with my feelings to ask “Have you ever noticed
anything strange about the energy in this building?” to which he
replied a bit eagerly “What do you mean?”
There was something in his being that
I knew I could trust him immediately with what I was about to say.
He was acting like a giant little kid behind his business desk even
with a suit and tie on. I began to tell him of the cold and warm
spots and the feelings of being followed all through out the
building. He said to me just then “Hold on a minute.” He
proceeded to get up from his comfortable chair and walk over to the
door, and closed it rather quickly. Sitting down again, noticing my
watching him intently, he said “some folks around here won't like
hearing what you have to say.” I understood what he meant and
proceeded to explain my earlier experiences.
He asked me if I knew anything of the
history of the building. I admitted to him that because I had been
too busy in my life raising my girls and getting by, that history
lessons on the area were greatly lacking. As he told me a bit of the
building's history I interrupted him and said well that explains why
that man is standing beside you then. He asked me point blank “What
man?” Clearing my throat and feeling like I was treading on ice so
very thin I was about to find myself over my head, I described this
man to the best of my ability.
This strong character, with a grey
uniform and gold epaulets on the shoulders. He showed me a weary
demeanor and was still standing strong. I detailed his face and hair
white, with a goatee that somewhat made his face a bit pointed more
than one would expect. Immediately, Bob became even more exited
almost shouting “You can see the colonel! Oh my God you can see the
Colonel!!!” This giant little kid emerged with so much excitement,
which honestly wasn't anything I had experienced before when telling
someone what I could see, shocked me. I was almost dumbstruck.
Somebody was excited and happy I could do this. There wasn't time to
process in my head his great joy in my revelation.
Jim started asking me many questions.
“How long have I been able to do this?” “Do I do this often?”
“What else can I pick up on?” and many more. The questions came
so quickly I had to take a moment and a deep breath or two in order
to reply. I told him that I'd always been able to do this and that
it was something I didn't like to discuss because I'd grown up with
such negatives about it that saying anything about my extended senses
was honestly scary for me to say anything at all.
We talked about our upbringings and
how he knew it was hard to come from this type of back ground and
open mental doors we had been told not to in so many ways. We
discussed the fear factor in some of our understand of how our
religious upbringing had made us keep tabs on how we said things and
to who we said them to.
Fear is a powerful base root emotion
that can affect our entire energy system and being. With me, fear
had been the major factor in keeping me quiet about my abilities and
gifts until this point in my life. Very few whom I was close to knew
I had any abilities. The extent of my abilities I had kept hidden
better than the combination at Ft. Knox for most of my life... Even
from me.
I met with Bob a few more times at the
office when I had other meetings. Over the weeks he asked me if I he
could reveal my little secret. At first I was exceptionally
hesitant. This was something about me that until Bob had become my
friend no one in my past liked. No one before had wanted to view
this part of me positively. My abilities had always lead to so much
difficulty in the past it took a lot for me to come forward enough
for him to know, let alone those in the office he worked with daily.
This would be my next challenge
opening the door a little further to the proverbial closet. How far
would I walk through it would take years. Like with most things in
our lives, it's often the little steps that make the big leaps.
.JPG)